What It Means to “Age”
Having just reached seventy five, I thought I would speak a bit to the idea of aging in terms of how our beliefs and perceptions influence the process. For those who follow my “Life from the Top of the Mind” philosophy, you know that I pay a lot of attention to what I call our “piece of the P.I.E.,” or our perceptions, interpretations, and expectations. In fact, I (along with much of psychology, in general) believe that these determine how we experience almost all aspects of life. The good news about this is that, if our goal is to be as influential in our lives as possible, then choosing our perceptions, interpretations, and expectations with a great deal of clarity and purpose would seem to be a good idea.
With respect to our age, I think it’s fair to say that we have certain beliefs attached to different stages of life. Many of these beliefs (perspectives, interpretations, expectations) aren’t particularly problematic until we reach our “golden years.” In other words, how we interpret being 30, 40 and even 50 can be good or bad depending on the situation we are in. However, when we think about being 60, 70, 80, and beyond, many of us tend to see this stage of life in a less positive light.
And, of course, there are some challenges that come with “getting on in age” that are real and can be difficult to deal with. So, to be clear, I’m not suggesting that we should just pretend that everything is wonderful when it’s not. What I am suggesting, however, is that we might be interpreting “getting old” in ways that don’t serve us, and further, that if we didn’t know how old we were, we might experience this age of our life differently.
For example, as I mentioned, I am now seventy five years old. I have actually been looking forward to this age because I get to play golf for a lot less money! Given that I love to play golf (but often find it a rather expensive hobby) this is quite a perk. Now, if someone were to ask me how old I “feel,” I would probably say forty-nine or fifty. I like this because I can think of my life (my energy, my ability to do things, etc.) in terms of this age while still taking advantage of my chronological age to play more (read “cheaper”) golf.
However, I do wonder whether continuing to keep count of how old I am from this point on will truly serve me? Will it be helpful to think of my self as seventy, seventy five, eighty, etc.? At the moment, I don’t see the advantage. Of course, I’m not saying that you “shouldn’t” count all your birthdays or claim your age. I encourage you to do whatever you feel is right. I’m just suggesting we keep Satchel Paige’s question in mind as we age. “How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you were?” If the answer is younger than you are, then maybe there is value in living life from this more purposeful perspective.
~ All the best, Dr. Bill