The Third Essential For Creating The Life You Want
This is the third installment, or what I call the third essential for creating the life you want. The first was “a purpose,” which described the importance of both having a goal (or an idea of what you want to accomplish) as well as a specific reason (or purpose) for doing what you do. In my book, “Life From The Top Of The Mind,” I describe this as our “highest purpose,” meaning it must become the most important thing we do in order to cut through the habits of the past.
The second essential is what I call “a place,” which means turning the problem (traffic, difficult people, etc.) into the practice field and using life as a place to practice defining yourself “on purpose.” I also mean having “a place” or a group of people (your friends, organization, family, etc.) that are on the same page, or have similar goals and values. This way you can support each other in the process, and you don’t have to do this all by yourself.
The third essential to creating the life you want is what I call “a practice,” and just like the first two, this aspect of the solution has multiple meanings. One is, of course, the importance of practicing who and how you want to show up in life. This is about having a clear sense of the qualities and characteristics you want to bring to life, and being able to imagine being this way. In other words, when dealing with the type of situations that in the past have triggered your stress, frustration, anxiety, anger, etc., it will be important to know what you want to practice so you don’t just go into these situations and react the way you always have.
In addition, the idea of “a practice” is about having a practice or a discipline that you do everyday for a while that reminds you of your highest purpose and turns life into a place to practice. I say “for a while,” because just as old ways of reacting to life have become habits, so can new ways of responding in a more purposeful manner. The truth is that every time we think, feel, or do anything, we are creating and reinforcing what are called “neural pathways” in our brain. These are physiological pathways that connect different parts of the brain, and as we practice living “life from the top of the mind,” we actually create and reinforce new neural pathways that go to the clear, confident, creative part of the brain.
Soon (within around 2 to 4 months if we practice all the time,) these become our new habits, and we really don’t have to think about it anymore… we just are naturally more calm, happy, confident, or whatever you have decided is your highest purpose… a way of living that you would recommend to someone you love.
Until then, however, having “a practice” will be essential in your success. Therefore I encourage you to begin your day by choosing who and how you want to be in the first few hours of the day or the morning. I then encourage you to stop around lunch time and “reboot,” or take a moment to choose who/how you want to be in the afternoon, and then do this again on the drive home, or the transition from afternoon to evening.
This way you are clear about your highest purpose, you are using life as a place to practice, and your “practice” or your discipline supports creating and sustaining the ways of being that you have identified as important, what I call “your highest purpose.” If this resonates with you, and you would like some support in creating your purpose, place, and practice, or if you would like me to come to your organization or school and teach everyone this process, feel free to contact me at drbill@billcphd.com, or 832-722-6147. This is what I love to do, or what I call my “purpose, place and practice,” and I would love to share this new information with you and yours.
~ All the best, Dr. Bill